Archive for April, 2013

Living on Video: Cruisin’ High (1976) and Street Trash (1987)

Video Store 1987

Time for a new feature, this one inspired by Lefty Limbo’s find above. He nails all the signs of the times in his post, and between us I think we identified all the visible movies, except for the one at the bottom left corner of notorious Psycho rip-off I Dismember Mama (the title spoofs I Remember Mama, a 1944 Broadway drama adapted for the screen in 1948). We put the year at 1987 based on the Witchboard and Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors counter displays.

I worked in a video store at the time, and I watched every one of these movies multiple times, customers be damned. (Once, for somebody’s birthday, we had a slumber party in the store and watched Videodrome and other “racy” fare after the parental chaperone nodded off.)

For most people interested in non-mainstream films, the VHS box was the only thing to go on when deciding what to rent. Sensational art (a detail of the theatrical poster) and creative blurbs often were the difference between profit and loss. A video wasn’t like a book or a comic—you couldn’t have a peek inside and see if it was worth your time and cash.

So I’m going to post full VHS cover spreads—what you would have seen while perusing the empty boxes on the aisles—of flicks from the era.

Cruisin' High

“In their brutal world, survival is the only grade that counts.” “Check out the scene at CRUISIN’ HIGH… gang warfare is the passing grade!” A little tear of appreciation just formed in the corner of my eye.

Cruisin’ High was originally released as Cat Murkil and the Silks in 1976. (Find a short and sweet review here.) The term “inner city,” with all its negative connotations, entered the vernacular between ’75 and ’85, when street gangs and violent crime were at their peak. Vigilantes were in (Guardian Angels, Bernhard Goetz, Dirty Harry, Paul Kersey, Mack Bolan, The Punisher), and the very concept of gangs scared the living crap out of all the people in the suburbs who promptly rented the movies designed to exploit their fear. “Warr-ee-urrs, come out to PLAY-EE-AAAY…

Street Trash

In Street Trash, the owner of a liquor store finds a stash of bad booze in his basement and, humanitarian that he is, sells it to the area winos. Problem: the bad booze literally melts the bums. It’s fantastic, a minor horror classic. The blurb is clunky, but the ingeniously trashy art makes up for it. Dude is melting into the toilet, people!

(First image originally via Pinterest; VHS cover images via VHS Wasteland)

UnderScoopFire!

USF!

Some of my stuff is featured today on UnderScoopFire!, a smart pop culture site dedicated to ’80s kids. The feature is called Monday Memory-gasm (oh-oh-oh, did you feel it?), and writer Howard Decker, who edits USF, dares to insinuate that John Lithgow would defeat Sharon Stone in a mud wrestling match. Villain!

Give USF a thorough ogling when you can. They’ve got, like, podcasts. I didn’t even know my laptop had a microphone until my wife told me.

Atari Headquarters and Nolan Bushnell, 1975

Atari HQ 1975

Atari HQ 1975-2

Atari Acorn 1975

Atari Keenan 1975

Atari Bushnell 1975

I found this gold at The Golden Age Arcade Historian, a new blog “dedicated to the history of arcade video games from the bronze and golden ages (1971 – 1984).” The photos are from one or more 1975 Play Meter magazines. Puppy Pong—you can see the edge of the poster to the right of the “intriguing portal”—refers to a cutesy table top version of Pong.

Speaking of Pong, Al Alcorn designed it. Not a bad accomplishment to put on your resume. The second guy is Joe Keenan (check the old school Pepsi can on his desk), who became president of Atari through a twist of irony. From Mental Floss:

Pinball distributors in the 1970s demanded exclusive deals for products before they would sign contracts. This would have impeded Nolan Bushnell’s ambitious plans to establish an entire industry. To get around the exclusivity requirements, Bushnell and his neighbor, Joe Keenan, secretly formed a second company that would “compete” against Atari, selling slightly modified Atari games to other distributors. They called it Kee Games. Ironically, Atari would later run into management trouble, while Kee Games continued operating smoothly and successfully. As a result, Joe Keenan was brought to Atari and promoted to president of the company.

Nolan Bushnell (third guy pictured) was, of course, the co-founder of and mastermind behind Atari. He looks kind of like a union boss in this photo. I feel like there’s a lit cigar perched on a 10-pound orange ashtray just off camera.

And here’s a February, 1973 Boston Herald article about Atari and the release of Pong.

Atari Boston Herald 1975

Keith Smith, who writes The Golden Age blog, notes that Syzygy (an awful name thankfully scrapped because a hippie candle company was using it) had incorporated under the name Atari in 1972. (The article incorrectly refers to Atari co-founder Ted Dabney as Fred Dabney.)

I love how Bushnell describes the business: “leisure applications of technology.” He hoped that people would “stop for a game… and become hooked into dropping coin after coin into the slot…” I’d say things worked out pretty well for the leisure applications, slotted to become an $82 billion industry by 2017.

2 Warps to Neptune on Facebook

For what it’s worth, if you “like” the 2 Warps to Neptune page, then you’ll see my posts (part of them, anyway) in your Facebook feed. You can also make hilariously snarky comments, if you so choose.

You’ll also see (I think) whatever random philosophical observations I decide to make, such as, “Hey, I just listened to Daft Punk’s Tron: Legacy soundtrack 28 times in a row, and I didn’t even really like the movie,” or, “Hey, on the last season of The Brady Bunch, Jan starts to look better than Marsha,” or, “Hey, just remember what old Jack Burton does when the earth quakes, the poison arrows fall from the sky, and the pillars of Heaven shake. Yeah, Jack Burton just looks that big old storm right in the eye and says, `Give me your best shot. I can take it.'”

It took me months to figure out how to synch Facebook to WordPress, people, so obviously the whole thing could end poorly.

In for a penny…

Birthday Party, 1980

Birthday Party, 1980

Is this a birthday party or a funeral? Cheer up, kids! For one thing, your clothes will never again be this awesome.

(Via FotoFraulein/eBay)

Comic Book Store, 1983

Comic Book Store 1983

Published in an unidentified newspaper on August 14, 1983. I see (click to enlarge) The Uncanny X-Men #175, What If #41, Vigilante #1, Thor #336, Thor Annual #11, The Thing #6, Star Wars #77, Frank Miller’s Ronin #2, Rom #48, The New Mutants #10, Moon Knight Special Edition #1, Marvel Universe #11, Marvel Age #8 (Stan Lee and Jim Shooter on the cover).

There’s a Starslayer (“A Celtic barbarian in the far-flung future”) poster on the upper right side of the wall. Next to it is a Jon Sable Freelance poster. Both series were written and drawn by Mike Grell (Warlord) and published by First Comics.

Interior shots of old comic shops are really rare. I’ve got one more here.

Homemade D&D Modules: The Golden Scepter of the Troll Fens, The Maze of Death, and The Priest of Evil (1981)

Walters D&D-1

Walters D&D-2

Walters D&D-4

Walters D&D-3

Walters D&D-5

Walters D&D-6

 

Hand-drawn, hand-typed, and hand-assembled by 13-year-old Mikey Walters in 1981, I present the first six pages of a fully realized, fully playable 28-page module. (Click the images for a bigger view.)

Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is to journey to the Troll Fens, retrieve the golden scepter (it “can cause Orcs to do any task, including suicide”), and bring it safely back to the Kingdom of Kala. The scepter is gold and exactly 5 ft. long, as you can see. If you find a golden scepter measuring 4 ft. or 6 ft., that’s totally cool, but it’s not the golden scepter we’re looking for.

How far is the Troll Fens from Kala, you ask? Well, it’s 575 miles by the main road, or “250 miles as the bird flies.” Those birds have all the luck! If you happen to doubt the accuracy of the distances, you have but to consult the awesomely rendered map. (I thought it was very biblical/philosophical of Mikey to put the Island of Evil and the Island of Knowledge side by side.)

Wait, there’s more.

 

Walters D&D-8

Walters D&D-9

Walters D&D-7

 

I really could have used these “Mini Modules” back in the day, since only two of us were serious about playing (serious about wanting to play, anyway). The covers are made of construction paper. The “Basic” banner on top is pure genius.

The cover of The Priest of Evil is pretty creepy, isn’t it? What’s he doing in that chair? Is he commanding the fire? Why won’t he show himself? Oh my God he’s going to kill us all with his mind!

Okay, one more page. I can’t resist. This one is from Mikey’s new monsters stat pages.

 

Walters D&D-10

 

“A Mad Dog is simply a dog with Rabies.” And let me tell you, the Rabies is nasty. “Within four days the victim will have great difficulty swallowing water… and in twelve days they will die.” A constitution or strength of 18 or better will give you a mere 10% chance of survival. Note to party: steer clear of Mad Dogs.

“A Jinnis is a disgusting creature that lives in swamps and other dark places.” You know, despite its sandpaper-like texture and devil horns and fire breath, I feel like the Jinnis gets a bad rap. This thing has a mother that loves it. For all we know, the Jinnis thinks we’re disgusting creatures that live in kingdoms and other sickeningly well-lighted places.

You’ll find the entire modules and other gems at Mikey’s D&D Memories Set on Flickr.

Also, the modules appeared last year at Rended Press, where they were kindly made available as PDFs: The Golden Scepter of the Troll FensThe Maze of Death, The Priest of Evil.

STAY TUNED: Mikey was kind enough to talk to me about his D&D creations and other childhood endeavors and experiences. The interview will run next week.

Arcade Cabinets: Moon Patrol (1982)

Moon Patrol Marquee

Moon Patrol CP

Moon Patrol CP-2

Moon Patrol Side Art

Moon Patrol Side Art-2

Moon Patrol Cabinet

Moon Patrol Flyer

Moon Patrol Flyer-2

(Images via arcadecontrols.com, RoTheBlog, KLOV forums, Classic Arcade Gaming, The Arcade Flyer Archive)

This is What Not Being Able to Save Your Game Looked Like

Kid Playing Atari

July 24, 1982. (Photo: Denver Post)

(Via Argenta Images/eBay)

Toy Aisle Zen (1984): Krull, Masters of the Universe, Star Wars, Stompers

Toys-1

Toys-2

Toys-3

Toys-4

Toys-5

Toys-6

Some of you will remember a controversial film from 1984 called Silent Night, Deadly Night (the working title was “Slayride”), in which a traumatized teenager goes nuts, puts on a Santa suit, and starts killing folks. Well, right before he loses it, Billy (that’s his name) works at Ira’s Toys, and that’s what you see here.

Toys of note include Jabba the Hut and Luke Skywalker, Hot Wheels Wipe-Out, Stomper: Badlands Trail, Matchbox Super Garage, Castle Grayskull, and, best of all, the psychedelic Krull board game. Get in my closet! Also, in the very last shot, you can see a massive, nondescript AT-AT box behind Grayskull.

Thanks goes to Geektarded for spying the goodness and grabbing the screenshots. Special thanks to Transformer World 2005 for the heads up (and the mention).


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